Scripture Passage
Ephesians 5:21-33
“21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” (NIV)
Text Critical Notes
There are only two notes worth mentioning and neither affects the meaning of the passage significantly. In verse 26, the word “cleansing” could be replaced with “having cleansed.” The only impact this could have is simply the tense in which one reads that one line. The other note is about the translation of the word “Now” in verse 24. This word is translated as “Therefore” (KJV), “But” (NASB) or even “Just” (NRSV). The original Greek word is αλλά, which should be translated as either but or however. In explanation to this very subject, F.F. Bruce says that verse 24 is a continuation of the thought from verse 22. Because Paul wants to continue this thought, he uses the word “but” in a context such as “…but—for this is the matter in hand—as the church is…” (Bruce, 385-6).
Outline of Passage
Mutual Submission (v. 21)
Wives’ Submission (vv. 22 – 24)
Husbands’ Submission (vv. 25 – 33)
MUTUAL SUBMISSION
It is imperative to understand that the hierarchical system that seems blatant in these verses is nonexistent when viewed contextually. Many commentators, whose agenda can only be discerned by themselves, seem to have neglected this wider view in favor of focusing on the precise words that Paul had written. When applying this hierarchical system in home life, husbands and wives usually fail at this submission and sacrificial love. If this is the way God wants us to live our lives, why do we continually fall short? The easy answer is that this is not how God created us to act nor expects us to act.
As mentioned above, Genesis 3:16b presents the effects of the Fall on the relationship between husband and wife. This is an effect not God’s will. This is probably the most important idea to comprehend when reading passages like this one in Ephesians.
If God does not want His beings created in His image to live in this way, in what way does He want us to live? Verse 21 encapsulates His desire in one simple sentence: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (NIV). God does not want the husband to rule over his wife nor does He want the wife to rule over her husband. He wants us to act like Christ in our most intimate relationships: our marriages.
The word “submit” is translated from the Greek word “ύποτάσσω” which has the concept of submitting willingly rather than being forced to do things. It is significant to realize that a person does this freely without another person telling or forcing them to do it. Willing submission is what Christ did when He allowed the authorities to arrest and execute Him.
This idea is not popular for the simple fact that it goes against what we have heard preached and taught about this verse all of our lives. This suggestion of a wife submitting to her husband as to Christ and a husband loving his wife as Christ loved the church sounds like a good model to follow. This way of thinking, however, denies the fact that Paul introduces later examples with “Submit to one another…” (emphasis added). This sentence effectively acts as an explanation of what was just stated as well as a preface to what he is about to say.
This sentence, when read in context of what was written prior to it, shows the believer how to live a Christ-filled life with other believers: through honoring God by submitting to one another. When read in context with the rest of the passage, it reads as an introductory statement to be illustrated further by the author (Radmacher, 839).
The word reverence used in this verse requires specific defining because there are so many different definitions of reverence. The word in Greek is φόβος which, when defined by Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance, reads
“[R]everential fear of God as a controlling motive of the life, in matters spiritual and moral, not a mere ‘fear’ of His power and righteous retribution, but a wholesome dread of displeasing Him; a ‘fear’ which banishes the terror that shrinks from His presence and which influences the disposition and attitude of one whose circumstances are guided by trust in God through the indwelling Spirit of God” (265 of Greek Dictionary of the New Testament).
At least two points can be drawn from this definition. First, the act of submission first comes out of a love for Jesus Christ. This is crucial to the achievement of true submission. Then, the results talked about below are natural outcomes rather than willful intentions.
Second, this act of submission to one another cannot be done by the power of the individual alone. The Holy Spirit must be working in the life of the believer for them to even have a modicum of success. For this reason very few, if any, mutual submissive relationships are seen. Most people cannot surrender all to the Lord.
WIVES’ SUBMISSION
“… [H]armony, guaranteed by the submissiveness of wives and the love of husbands is paramount” (Houlden, 329). “The Gospel…recognizes and secures man’s responsible leadership” (Moule, 138). “[T]he general principle is that a woman is to bend over backwards to defer to the leadership and authority of her husband” (Sproul, 140). “[Christianity] enjoins…the dutiful observance of the ties of kinship or subservience recognized by the law of nature itself as of cogent validity” (Simpson, 128). “[T]he will of the husband is a law to the wife” (Wesley). These references are only a handful of the ideas that are available on this subject. This apparent lack of respect for women and narrow view are two reasons why this passage must be fully understood.
There are some statements by commentators that try to rectify the damage done by these statements listed above. However, the statements that are available are few and far between. Johnson-Leese and Scholer give a lengthy, but interesting discourse about the fact that there is no main verb in verse 22 and the reasons why and the explanation of how we determine the meaning of the verse. The main verb is found in the preceding verse: submit. They then go on to say that this verb is a modifying verb to the earlier main verb found in verse 18: translated “…be filled with the Spirit” (xxxiii; see also Powell, 701) (NIV). Powell then gives her own translation of how it should be read and understood, “be filled with the Spirit…submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ; wives, to your husbands, as to the Lord” (701).
Another point about women’s submissiveness that bears mentioning is the aspect of woman’s “head” being man. Sproul unashamedly states, “…headship involves leadership” (140). Once again this statement fails to take in the entire context. Paul is not speaking of superior/inferior, but rather equal submission. When he brings the Jesus/church image into the equation, there is little room for doubt. This is meant to create a picture of Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross rather than one of “glorious ruling” (Powell, 704).
Moule states that when the text says “…wives should submit to their husbands in everything” (verse 24) this is overruled by “supreme allegiance to Christ” (139). This concept is shared by other commentators as well (see Bruce, 386; Simpson, 129). This idea that there is an unstated, or even purposefully omitted, direction that a wife should follow God’s instruction if her husband’s directions are contrary to what God says deny the fact of the stated intention of the passage. This intention is that this is an ideal model of a married husband and wife who live in Spirit-filled harmony with one another.
HUSBANDS’ SUBMISSION
To the credit of Sproul, he is correct in assuming that most men want to stop reading after verse 24 (141). The reason for this desire to stop reading is that men like the idea of a woman submitting to their “leadership” (read: desire, whim, etc.) without having to reciprocate in any way. Women are different, however, in that they see that if they have to submit to their husbands, they want their husbands to treat them in the way Paul says Christ acted toward His church. Paul’s intention was not to pit men and women against each other, but rather to bring them into a more harmonious relationship with each other and with Christ. He does this by presenting the ultimate act of sacrifice and submission: Christ’s willing crucifixion.
This display of submission by a husband for his wife is, hopefully, the natural outcome of living a life filled with the Holy Spirit. It is important to remember that Paul sets this up as an ideal, not as what will absolutely happen.
Paul uses the analogy of someone who takes care of his own body when referring to how a husband should care for his wife. The meaning behind this strange but appropriate parallel is merely that it should be second-nature to provide for ones wife. A man feeds, clothes, cleans and in all other ways cares for his body mostly without thinking about it. So it should be with his wife. He should be so in tune with his wife’s needs and desires, this happens through total submission, that he provides for them unconsciously and willingly.
In this portrait of the Spirit-filled man, Paul quotes from Genesis 2:24, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh” (also Ephesians 5:31) (NIV). This quote is very clear-cut in its purpose: each partner must submit to the other wholly and equally. This leaves no room for one to direct the other. When two people are “one flesh” in Christ, their intentions are identical; there need not be one overriding voice lest it be that of God.
The last thought of this passage has the ability to destroy the argument presented in this paper, if, that is, it is not viewed in context. Verse 33 says that men must άγαπάω (love) his wife and the wife must φοβέω (show reverential fear [note: this is different than the reverential fear mentioned above from verse 21]) to her husband. The word choice of Paul for “love” is interesting when the definition is understood. It means to love in a social or moral sense. In this ideal relationship where the husband has no blame or stain, he is morally obligated to love his wife. This is different than the moral obligations that we as stained humans have because we deny these obligations and go our own way. In this passage the moral obligation has the feel of a Divine moral obligation (i.e. God has a moral obligation to be just because He said He is a just God, “He is the Rock, His works are perfect, and all His ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is He” [Deuteronomy 32:4 NIV]).
The wife is not let off the hook, however. This reverential fear that she holds for her husband is also the ideal action of a woman who, in the same way as her husband, has no blame or stain. She will give him all of the respect he deserves from his submission to her just as she will get the love she deserves from her submission to him, not because of the others submission, but because they themselves have submitted to the other.
Some people may say that Paul does not expect that every reader of this passage will understand all that he is talking about. They would then evidence their argument with Paul’s statement from verse 32: “this is a profound mystery” (NIV). However, Paul is not saying that his personal statement is a “profound mystery,” but rather that God’s ability to make two human beings become one flesh through the sacrament of marriage is the “profound mystery.” In fact, Paul wrote in such a way that almost anyone can understand what he is saying.
CONCLUSION
SUMMATION
Paul wrote these words to the body of believers in Ephesus, not to counter some pagan/heretical doctrine that was creeping into the church, but rather to reaffirm Jesus’ prayer, in John 17, for the unity of believers. He also wrote the letter to build up the believers’ faith in Christ Jesus and their subsequent reliance on Him. He wanted to encourage the Christians to continually strive for the perfection that was lost when man first sinned. He did not mince any words in this entire letter and this passage is just one out of many that deal with the topic of unity.
It is clear that we are no nearer the mark of the perfect relationship that Paul talks about than were the believers that this letter was originally intended to hearten. One possible reason is that many people, men and women, have taken the verses out of context and so, in some instances unintentionally but others most definitely intentionally, began a conflict with their spouse that can be difficult to resolve. Men want, consciously or unconsciously, a wife who submits to him in every aspect of their lives together, while women want, again consciously or unconsciously, a husband who is sacrificial in all that he does for her. This cannot and will not happen unless the couple is completely pure and without sin in their lives.
These verses, as with all Scripture, must be read and studied in the proper contexts for their true meaning to be discerned. When these verses are read with the whole context of the Bible taken into consideration, there is no possible implication of inferiority to be found.
APPLICATION
Each person who reads these verses must prayerfully ponder whether God, in His infinite wisdom, would tell husbands that their wives are inferior to them. When God’s intention is discerned in this respect, and indeed all areas, we feel a sense of freedom to live the way God originally intended for us to live. The body of Christian brothers and sisters will be able to live a more Spirit-filled life when it is understood that God does not desire His creation to live a life under a hierarchical system of superiority/inferiority. It is also important to realize that God gives each person different gifts with which to use for His glory. He does not give the gift of leadership ability to only men or to only women, but to certain individuals whom He chooses.
WORKS CITED
Bruce, F.F. “The Epistle to the Ephesians.” The New International Commentary on the New Testament: The Epistles to the Colossians, to Philemon, and to the Ephesians. Grand Rapids: Eerdmans,1984.
Houlden, J.L. “The Letter to the Ephesians.” Paul's Letters from Prison: Philippians, Colossians, Philemon, and Ephesians. Philadelphia: The Westminster Press, 1977.
Johnson-Leese, J.J, and Scholer, David M. Introduction. The IVP Women's Bible Commentary. Eds. Catherine Clark Kroeger and Mary J. Evans. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2002. xxxiii.
Moule, H.C.G. Studies in Ephesians. Grand Rapids: Kregel Publications, 1977.
Powell, Claire M. “Ephesians.” The IVP Women's Bible Commentary. Eds. Catherine Clark Kroeger and Mary J. Evans. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2002.
Radmacher, Earl, Ron Allen, and H. Wayne House, eds. “Ephesians.” Compact Bible Commentary. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 2004.
Simpson, E.K. “Commentary on the Epistle to the Ephesians.” The New International Commentary on the New Testament. Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1972.
Sproul, R.C. Ephesians. Ross-shire, Scotland: Christian Focus Publications, 1994.Wesley, John. “Commentary on Ephesians 5.” John Wesley's Explanatory Notes on the Whole Bible (1765). 12 November 2006.
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